Compassion goes beyond empathy by not only recognizing someone’s suffering but also motivating you to take action to help alleviate it. It’s a desire to make a positive difference in another’s life, fueled by understanding their pain.
A wonderful serenity has taken possession of my entire soul
- Empathy: Understanding and sharing another’s feelings, often feeling what they feel.
- Compassion: Recognizing someone’s suffering and wanting to help, leading to action.
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Action vs. Feeling:Compassion is about doing something to help, while empathy is about feeling with someone.
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Other-Oriented:Compassion focuses on the well-being of others, while empathy can be more self-centered.
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Motivation:Compassion is driven by a desire to alleviate suffering, while empathy might lead to feelings of distress.
Here’s what you can do when that mindfulness bell sounds:
Let’s try to understand. Instead of forming an instant opinion about someone, invite yourself to be curious instead. Consider if you can make an effort to truly understand the person rather than assuming they’re wrong. When we judge others, we miss the opportunity to truly understand them. Often, it’s a lack of knowledge or perspective that leads us to be judgmental.
Ask yourself how you might find a good-hearted explanation. Reflect on how you could interpret the other person’s behavior in a kind and compassionate way. There may be an explanation that makes the other person seem inconsiderate or ignorant, but there’s also one that assumes they have good intentions. While this isn’t always easy, when someone is doing something irritating, we might consider that they are simply trying to find happiness. When someone lashes out at you, they might be experiencing fear. Perhaps this fear stems from a desire to protect their vulnerable hearts. There’s always a compassionate way to explain actions—even those we might initially perceive as harmful. We don’t need to excuse the action, but we can recognize the tender heart beneath it.
Recall what it feels like to go through similar difficulties. We’ve all experienced fear, frustration, anxiety, uncertainty, and discomfort. If we see the good-hearted intention behind someone’s actions, we can better understand the challenges they face alongside those intentions. And we can remember what it feels like to struggle with pain, fear, frustration, anger, or grief.
Once we begin to understand the person and their actions, recognize the kindness behind their choices, and empathize with their struggles… we can start offering compassion.
